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“The Sex Is Great, But The Relationship Doesn’t Work.” What Do You Do? (07/18/2022)

The Four Basic Dating/Relating Scenarios

- Mutual Interest/Attraction -You're interested/attracted, but not reciprocated -The Other is attracted/interested, but you not in them -Mutual Disinterest, Zero connection and a bust all the way around.

There is a fifth I neglected to mention last week, for single who are dating actively and who frequently get sexually involved, early on before there is an emotional connection or relationship established. This is very common to find yourself in a situation with someone that you regret having gotten yourself into or are dumbfounded by how you got there.

Fifth is, ‘’The sex is great, but the relationship sucks, (or we’re arguing all the time, not getting along, should be this difficult to communicate, nothing gets resolved, never get to understanding each other."

Attraction and sex heighten excitement, bodily and emotionally, imagination gets a lift as well, idealization, your perception gets distorted and judgment impaired. You’re at increased risk of getting over involved too fast, assume more of a relationship that there is or “Uh Oh-” you’re in a situation you don’t want to be in and you want to get out of, but don’t know how.

Cognitive dissonance is at work here, square peg in round hole, trying to get the relationship fit the mold of idealization, rather than, mindful practice staying connected and assessing how you feel observant and remain somewhat detach, take one encounter at a time, enjoy the experience without having to act on impulse, surf the waves of some very hot sex, without having to get more emotionally involved.

You need to have some humility to take care of yourself. Sex is a slippery slope.

Mindful Practice- Enjoy the experience and excitement without losing objectivity, while staying abreast about how you feel, the actual amount of time you spent together or assume more of a relationship that it is.

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