Homophobia, Anonymous Sex and Intimacy

I very much identified with your article, "Homophobia, Anonymous Sex and Intimacy." I'm sure I'm one of many homos who really struggle with intimacy. Actually, I don't struggle, I absolutely run from it; terrified by it. And I know sloppy drunk encounters are not what I want. I think what would work for me is being locked in group therapy, specifically one dealing with intimacy. When I say locked in I mean it. I have a lot of self-loathing. I yearn for intimacy. I can't do this alone. I've been in therapy before and on medication. My insides tell me I have to break down, fall apart in a way. I want to be in a supportive environment that I believe in so I feel I can do that. Guess I want some control over where my mess is displayed.

I currently live on Guam. Yeah,good luck finding a gay group out here. I'll return to San Diego next year. If you have any suggestions, I'd appreciate the input. Thanks for having your article available on the internet and thanks for reading this. Sincerely.

Response from Daniel...

Thanks for your post.

You're not alone with regards to yearning for intimacy, lacking the necessary skills and understanding, have fear and a gloomy outlook on the potential for you to create more intimacy in your life. The overwhelming majority of relationships are dysfunctional and perpetuate continued dysfunction. You would find my book, Relational Recovery, Empowering the Transformation of Relationships or E-Book most useful. It works as an indispensable guide or handbook and gives you a lot to think about and apply in the real world. Unfortunately, I do not know of any group (in Guam) that would be an appropriate venue for you to cathart.

Daniel