Should I Leave an Abusive Relationship?

I have been in a relationship with a crystal meth addict for over a year. She has been in NA for as long as I have known her. She used for 9 years, and has been clean for 3 years. I know that she verbally abused her ex girlfriend, but thought it wouldn't happen to me - she doesn't do drugs now. But she has had some behavior issues and she blames it all on me. She controlled me, didn't want me to go out dancing, although we live in different cities. She did not want me to hang out with other lesbians. When she got mad at me she would hang up the phone. When we started having problems (because of the long distance and the fact that she tried to get with a new comer in her group) I visited her. For two weeks she yelled, called me names, blamed every problem on me and said "I don't want to deal". She locked herself in her room. She rubbed dirty underwear up my face, lied and bossed me around.

My question. What do I do? I broke up with her and feel guilty. Can behavior patterns from her 9 years of addiction still exist? Even after 3 years in recovery?

Response from Daniel....

I'm hard pressed to recall whether I've ever met or worked with an addict either in recovery or not, whose family of origin relationships, as well as current ones weren't predominantly dysfunctional. From what you described, breaking up with her comes across as a perhaps difficult, but reality based decision and that represents healthy self interest. When communication deteriorates the way it has for you and becomes abusive as you say yours had become, it is usually a good time to walk. Regardless of how much recovery there is, if you're considering getting back together, some intensive couples therapy or training is strongly recommended.